SIDE TRIP 30: Bangkok FLEaSH Market

Patpong is both a flea and a flesh market. The two short alleys stretching between Silom and Surawong Roads are easily Bangkok's best-known, most notorious nightlife area. From the main road, it will appear like it’s a row of tiangges but on each side of the stalls, the doors of the bars are wide open, giving one and all a good view of bikini-clad women gyrating on the ledge. Of course, bar work is only half the job. The real money comes from selling sex to tourists. (During the Vietnam War, American GIs flocked to Thailand for some R&R which they actually called I&I – intoxication and intercourse.)

Together with one Canadian lady and two Indonesian co-participants at the conference I attended, we explored Patpong 1 and Patpong 2 on the eve of Halloween. Never mind that we had a blonde bombshell with us, hustlers immediately went to work, flashing their laminated “menus” in our faces to lure us inside the bars, yelling “Lookee, lookee! Want see pussy show? Pussy smoke cigarette! Pussy open bottle! Pussy pingpong ball show!”

No amount of head-shaking and repeated “No! No!” can deter the hustler. “Lookee! Lookee! Pussy Write Letter. Snake Show. Eggplant Show. Banana, you see already?"

Aaaaargh!

Love it or hate it, few will forget their first trip to Patpong.